And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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