when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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