"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
