i jhust puked up my retainher.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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