I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize
