im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
