8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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