I'm sorry my penis didn't work
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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