I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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