1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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