Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
