1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
