Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
