Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
