im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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