The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
The best revenge is premature balding
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
