and you said cock pushups were impossible
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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