just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
did you just send me my own nude
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
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