You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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