i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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