She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
