dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Randomize