BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
