KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Hippo gnu deer
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
