it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
