stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
