I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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