there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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