Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
How many fucks given?
0.12846
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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