I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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