I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Randomize
