I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Randomize
