I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize