Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I am naked and annoyed.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
