The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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