Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
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Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
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I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
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