so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
