Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
We are all done wearing pants today
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
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