so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Randomize
