so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Randomize
