He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
