Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
