glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
