soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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