She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Randomize
