i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
