honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize