So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize