I am in a vortex of obligation.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
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