I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
